Casual vs. priorities, and yay for the online world

I spent this last weekend in Sequoya with my husband, neighbors, friend, and three people I met online. We rented a cabin in the middle of nowhere, cooked about five times as much food as we needed to, played on the big trees, roleplayed with our dice, and stayed up at least until 2 in the morning each night just talking to each other.

It was fantastic. And none of us got axed to death!

I have been interacting with these folks online for almost two years. To see them face-to-face was fairly incredible. We've probably eaten more virtual food together than we could ever in real life. We managed to try to meet once a week online (sometimes more than that!) for almost two years. I don't even see my little sister that much! But the form of our hanging out--that is, hopping online for a few hours--is so much easier than driving anywhere. It was a casual game, so scheduling conflicts weren't so much of an issue. And unlike email or letters, our chatting was immediate... no waiting around for someone to remember to write back.

Mr. Althouse recently blogged about making social interactions a priority. And contact with other humans does have to be a priority. That priority is so much easier to follow thorugh if it's casual. What does that mean? Am I more likely to speak to the random person in my class than I am to speak to my own mother? And why should that be true of me? ...I don't think it should be.

This fabulous trip down to a cabin in the middle of nowhere really made me think... why can't I do this with my family? The answer really is, I can. Giving the gift of time and social interaction is probably the best I can give. Times like these are precious, and create more fond memories than anything I can buy. For some reason, though, doing something as simple as calling Granny for a quick "hi" is intimidating. I find I'm "too busy"or "not in the mood."

I spent this last few days thinking about my relationship with my parents. How, in a few short years, they've had to go from providing me with food to being a distant figure in my life. What I expect and hope of our relationship is for us to be friends--to give advice, to check up on each other, and most of all, to just spend some casual time together.

It's so hard to be casual with those who are closest to us. My best friends are my neighbors; we've discovered we can spend casual time together, by just watching half an hour of TV together. My other best friends come to visit me each weekend, and we lounge in the hot-tub. The fabulous friends online we have made, are available casually through a game. But my parents don't have time to drive down each week. I can't drive up each week. If they would just use Trillian each evening...

We really reveled in our geekiness this weekend. We shared in-game stories and hilarious mistells. We had so much common ground based upon the cumulative hours--days--likely, months--we've spent interacting together. All that time seemed like nothing at the time... it was so easily spent, a few hours at a time.

I've got a new goal for communicating with those around me, and that is to make regular phone calls and visits, to make them so regular they become casual, and easy to do. Shy little me will be stepping out a bit. Wish me luck!